chase your dream

I seem to found my directions,
but who will be there to guide me, if there is any.
Am i fated to do everything alone?
i'm waiting for a sign..
a sign for me to go.
to go chase my dream.....

好久沒寫了.
工作的忙碌讓生活起了變化.
時間突然過得好快, 不知不覺又過了一天.
不僅僅時間少, 精力也變少.
雖這麼說, 我還是盡量得去珍惜每一刻.

最近好多思緒在我腦海中.
讓我覺得很矛盾, 不知所措.

正常生活裡的我顯得很隨和,
感情裡的我卻很難搞.
無法否認, 無庸置疑的.
慢慢的發現愛一個人真得好難.
對我而言, 似乎失去愛一個人的信心.
傷害最深卻也是愛我最深的人.
我的心像是被封閉著, 怎樣也打不開.
不喜歡痛苦的感覺,
更不喜歡看到因我而痛苦的人.

距離是個殘酷的問題.
我不想去面對, 卻不能不去面對.
不想不代表它不存在.
想了卻不知怎麼解決.

現實就是這麼得殘酷.
很多人都選擇了逃避.
好不喜歡走一步算一步的感覺.
總覺得人生應該有規畫.
有規畫才會有未來.
我希望能把握現在,
更希望能有未來.

Starting all over again

Time really flies.
The date on my last post reflects the reality of this saying.
It has been almost 2 months. Life certainly has changed.
Better. Or rather more satisfactory.
Definitely the place i want to be in. Finally putting into what i learn into my line of duty.
Stress are inevitable. It justs depends on how you would handle.
Thinking process becomes an everyday work. Gone are the days of spoon-feedings.
You are required to take more initiative and make difficult decisions.
I may not wish to stay in the organisation for long but i believe this is the place where i would be able to take something with me when i leave.

For once in 6 years of my life in this organisation, I can finally say I am enjoying what I am doing now.
=========

Out of MINDEF

5th March 2010 marks the end of my MINDEF tour.
It has been a long 5 years serving the Ministry.
Finally, i get to do what i wanted most when i put my name on that dotted line.
I'm giving a comfortable life for a stressed and challenging job.
But i guess the latter is much more fufilling.
I don't know how long i would stay in this line, perhaps just buying time.
At least before i leave, i get to learn something different.

What the future holds depends on us.
You don't plan for your future, there will be none.

你快樂嗎

兩人在一起的世界
有時連自己都不了解.
分隔兩地,
需要的是那麼多的信任跟體諒.

在一起的時刻總是那麼短暫卻又這麼可貴.
為什麼每次都得鬧僵.
說好的珍惜呢?
是你的錯? 還是我的錯?
時不時都環繞這問題.
難道我們之間只能以這種方式溝通嗎.

有時真的覺得好累.
看到這樣的你也很心疼.
讓我也開始懷疑了自己.
你真的覺得快樂嗎?

我了解自己嗎

昨天去批了名.
我知道很多人一定很驚訝為什麼我會去.
認識我的人都知道我不信什麼算命師這類的.
或許我覺得有點徬徨吧.
對人生, 對自己.
感覺開始不了解自己, 到底要的是什麼.
可能我需要的是一點肯定, 一點鼓勵.
我真的不想就這樣過完我一生.
內心深處真的覺得有點無助.
我好想為自己做點事卻又不知從何做起.

說到這批名師,
真的是句句刺中我心.
沒想到從名字能看得出一個人的格性.
說到我固執啦, 很直接的一個人.
喜歡或不喜歡都很直接得表現出來.
雖說他不是算命師, 但優缺點都被他一一點中.
想到都覺得有點不可思議.
我的人生真的是過得比人慢.
要過30才會比較好.
也不知道是好事還是壞事.
反正都快30了也沒差那兩年.

可能現在我已更了解自己要的是什麼吧.
心中的徬徨也少了點.
只能希望我想的都能做到.


人只能活一次
想做就去做

從新出發?

新的一年的開始.
感覺上自己又老了一歲, 卻好像一點成就也沒有.
有點可悲~

回顧去年的點點滴滴, 似乎發生了不少事.
生活起了小變化, 也嚐試了不少沒做過的事.
這些小變化讓我覺得挺開心, 雖然有點辛苦.
但是, 生活上總是覺得空虛.
或許我並不喜歡現狀吧.
總覺得在浪費人生.
人生不過如此, 短短幾十年.
也許是時候踏出那一步, 去感受人生.

我不在的這幾天好像發生了很多事.
而這些事讓我質問自己, 到底為了什麼而活?
為了錢?
為了理想?
為了愛?
為了生活?
不知為了什麼而活, 人生就變得沒意義.

我還沒失去人生的意義, 但已沒了工作的源動力.
慢慢的發現這不是我想要的工作,
這不是我想要的生活.

新的一年,
盼望著新的開始,
盼望著新的動力,
更盼望著新的生活.

Art of running

Never thought that there are so much knowledge into running.
Most of us probably will just run for the sake of fitness, or part of physical training.
I came to realise that there are more to it.
Recently bought a book about running techniques - Master the Art of Running.
Halfway through the book, i had already found myself running the wrong way.
Now, you are probably wondering is that a wrong way of running.
Well, the answer is yes and many of us are doing it.

I have been running for the past 1 year, never did i think about the way i run
or the way i breathe, the way i land my foot.
Although my timing had improved through the year, i find myself stuck at a
point where i could not exceed myself.
No doubt i have been running very regularly but running the wrong way as well.
Even though many regards me a good runner now, i do not see myself as good
or near the best. Instead, i'm still far away as good.

There seem to be a new leash of life in running now.
There are so much to learn about this simple sport.
From posture to breathing to technique, i seem to be starting all over again.
But i am glad i learning the right way now.
I got the foundation. I just need to correct and get used to the corrrect way of running.
It is going to be difficult but definitely beneficial.

Learn the art of running and enjoy it.
Then results will come...

折磨人的愛情

究竟兩個人在一起是為了什麼?
在一起是為了分手嗎?
當下的人是否認真想過.
曾經許下的承諾,
如今又剩下什麼.
可憐了那些為愛痴狂的人.
可憐了那些為愛傷害的人.
我只想保護和珍惜愛我的人.
愛情不就莫過於此嗎..

End of 2009 races

It has been a year of milestones for me.

I challenged my limits and what a way to end 2009.

It started off in April when i set myself a target to acieve IPPT gold.

I got it from my second try.

After which i decided to run more and longer distances.

Army half marathon was the first.

I averaged from 30-50km every week,running day in day out.

It paid off as i begin running more comfortably and faster.

Running the full marathon was not on my agenda initially.

But with more than 6mths to train, i thought i'll give it a try.

The training was never easy.

Clocking distances i had never ran before.

It just gets further and further each week.

The completion of the race without stopping was satisfying.

A realistic target was set and i ran well below it.

Well, with my first marathon done, more were to come.

Resolutions for next year is simple, run more and faster.

when the going gets tough, it's just mind over body....